Think about a time when you experienced feeling guided or had an amazing idea. Where do you believe that came from?
Our higher self is the part of us that knows everything and it constantly tries to speak to us, give us insight, and guide us in our day-to-day lives. This looks different for all of us but it can come in the form of a gut feeling, a sensation, an idea, a memory, etc. Whatever the case, you will know when it’s your higher self.
If you want to improve the connection you have with your higher self and speak with it more often, start with thanking that voice anytime you notice it’s communication with you.
So for example, next time you experience a situation where you felt that voice was making it’s presence known to you, thank it for whatever it did. Maybe you thought about a person you haven’t seen in a while and then you ran into them-this could be an example of your higher self telling you that you were going to run into that person. Or maybe you felt a sense of calm after a stressful day-this could be an example of that voice reassuring you that everything is going to be okay. Maybe you even get bad vibes from a certain someone and your higher self is trying to warn you to stay away from that person.
Or it could be something totally different. Maybe you’ve been feeling something inside of you that you can’t really explain but it’s a sensation that just won’t go away. This could be your higher self trying to communicate with you that it’s time to dig deep internally and identify something that you might be holding onto that you aren’t even aware of.
I’ll share a personal example. Recently, I ran into someone who I hadn’t seen in a while that I used to have feelings for. Running into him brought back certain emotions that I absolutely didn’t like: confusion, annoyance, a little bit of self-doubt all in the form of what just felt like a knot in my stomach. This is a person who I hadn’t seen in years so as you could imagine, the feelings I just described would come up. I wasn’t surprised by these feelings since things were left in the dark with that person and I never really understood why we hit it off and then he just wasn’t interested all of the sudden.
For a while I thought it was something I said or did, or maybe he wasn’t attracted to me. Every possibility ran through my mind but eventually, I let it go. I accepted that whatever it was, it didn’t deserve my time or energy anymore. But once I ran into him after the time that passed it just brought back all of these old emotions, in addition to the knot in my stomach. At first it didn’t bother me, but weeks passed and that feeling didn’t reside.
I felt like my higher self was trying to communicate something to me but I didn’t know what it was. All I knew was that if I wanted to know why the knot was there, that I had to speak to it. And that’s exactly what I did. Here is what my internal dialogue looked like with myself. To hopefully make this less confusing “me 2” refers to the part of me that is answering my questions. You could also view this as my higher self guiding me through this conversation:
Me: “Why are you here? What are you trying to tell me and what do I need to know?”
Me 2: “I’m still hurt. It hurt me to open up to someone and feel like I wasn’t given a chance. I feel like I was vulnerable in being myself, and that it was not enough.”
Me: “Why did you feel like being yourself wasn’t enough?”
Me 2: “Well I was talking to someone who I liked and felt like everything went well until we hung out. And once we did, there was something about the conversation or myself that he didn’t like because after that, he stopped talking to me.”
Me: “So you feel like you were yourself and something about that turned this person away?”
Me 2: “Yes.”
Me: “Why does that bother you?”
Me 2: “I guess it makes me feel like he didn’t want to choose me..”
Me: “And why does being chosen matter to you?”
Me 2: “Well… it’s shitty when you like someone and feelings aren’t mutual. I know I won’t always be someone’s first pick, but it doesn’t erase the pain that comes with it.”
Me: “Exactly…you won’t always be a choice someone makes. And their choice has nothing to do with you, and everything to do with them…their preference, what makes them happy, and what lines up with what they want in their life. Them not choosing you isn’t about you-it’s about them. So what else is it? What is bothering you beneath not being chosen?”
Me 2: “Well…I experienced this alot as a child…not being chosen. I felt like I was isolated being one of the only African American students at the private school I went to. And growing up, all of my friends had boyfriends and I was the only one who the boys didn’t pick…I didn’t start receiving attention until I was in 7th grade and especially in high school. I honestly never looked back since I got older.”
Me: “Okay…we are getting somewhere. So you internalized rejection and isolation that never ended up getting addressed. And you didn’t feel that as much as an adult?”
Me 2: “Nope…I did not feel rejected or unwanted by any of the guys I’ve dated as an adult. Sure, none of these relationships worked out but I didn’t feel unwanted as a result of it. Not until the guy I met that we are talking about now. He opened up a wound I guess I forgot about.”
Me: “Damn…he really did. So what are going to do about this unhealed childhood wound?”
Me 2: “I’m going to work through these feelings now that I understand where they came from. I’m going to close my eyes and envision the little girl who felt rejected, tell her that she is beautiful the way she is and the only person who ever needs to choose her is HERSELF. I’m going to give her a big hug and tell her how much I love her, and remind her of this as often as I need to.”
Me: “She loves you too. And she greatly appreciates the man who came to serve his purpose in her life. He was the teacher for this important lesson.”
Isn’t it amazing what this conversation with myself allowed me to reveal? Because I was willing to go there with myself I was able to understand why that knot in my stomach wouldn’t go away. You can imagine how grateful I was to my higher self for begging me to pay attention to feelings I was experiencing in my body. I needed to go back to my childhood and remember the pain I felt and how I was still carrying that energy within me without even realizing it.
The more I thank my higher self for making her presence known to me and for always guiding me, the more my connection to her grows. Every day I feel her presence and know when it’s time to sit and listen. If you’re reading this, I just want you to know that you can experience the same exact thing but of course in your own way.
The meaning behind whatever event or sensation you experience is going to be specific to you and your higher self. You can create whatever meaning you want to create, and that’s what makes the connection with your higher self so beautiful-only you know the meaning behind it. And if you aren’t sure what the meaning is when this power talks to you, go with what you think it means. Only you have the most context about your life so run with the meaning that speaks to you most.
And if you’re looking for a place to start, here are some affirmations you can tell yourself to help strengthen the connection with your higher self:
- I am so grateful for my higher self.
- My higher self is ALWAYS guiding me, and I listen.
- I am in tune with my higher self.
- The connection with my higher self grows deeper and deeper each day.
- My higher self is always protecting me.
- Thank you higher self. I know you are always with me, that you love me, and have my best interest in your heart. <3
With love,
Lidet
Photo by Roberto Nickson on Unsplash